Two Hicks Escape the Law

Once again I’ve been let down by the media here in the US. As exhibit A I’m introducing the photo to your left. Significant air time and large portions of papers and websites are devoted to these two idiots. Why? Because they managed to escape in a hail of gunfire. That’s it. I’m sure tons of prisoners escape jail each year in some way or another.

But what about the guard they killed? Ah, yes, another dull tool in the shed. You see, it’s mandatory protocol for guards to wear bullet proof vests. You see, Guard Wayne “Cotton” Morgan wasn’t following protocol when he was shot in the belly. In fact, both guards weren’t wearing their bullet proof vests. I’m not sure about you, but if I worked in law enforcement I’d be wearing my bullet proof vest at all times, including when I was in the doughnut shop ordering coffee.

So, when you look back at the “Big News Events” of 2005 you can think about all the time wasted on some drunk girl going missing and these two redneck hick idiots. Just look at that picture and think to yourself, “Wow, I wasted time reading about these retards.” I mean they didn’t even put up a fight when they were captured. They shot up a parking lot, meticulously planned the escape (including multiple escape vehicles), killed a guard and then just said “Ah, screw it, I give up.”?

Meanwhile, we’re fast approaching 2,000 casualties in Iraq and there are rumblings between the US and Iran. Rove knowingly outed an undercover CIA operative. Bush extended daylight savings breaking most of those expensive electronic toys you own. And, to top it all off, I have to put up with news about these two retards every time I open CNN.com.

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