White Castle

Whoever invented this shithole of a fast food resturant should be shot. Me and my colon have a huge beef with him. All of my friends, Paul, Noel, Stat, Schenkel, etc. love this place for late night trips after the bar.

Saturday, after Marquette got spanked and Syracuse’s freshman phenom showed the world what was up, I caved and went to “the Castle” with Lauren and my friend Josh. I got a “sack” of 10 with no pickles. When I got home I choked down (literally) eight of them. The last two I gagged on and was only able to swallow with a healthy swig of Rock n’ Rye.

Needless to say, this came back to haunt me the next day. Some of the rankest foulest odors on the planet came from my lower bowels all morning. Thank goodness I was by myself at work. This all culiminated in quite possibly a 10 on the Rate My Poo scale. I hope Mr. Castle is happy now, because soon he’s gonna die at the hand of my angry colon. I’m off to go get a colonoscopy now …

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